As I meditated on kindness, these statements came to mind:
Be kind to oneself, for kindness to others comes out of being kind to oneself.
Love your neighbour as you love yourself.
There is peace as you are kind to yourself.
Kindness was the thought I had as I entered into 2020. These are not new thoughts, but now seems the right time to share, amidst the uncertainty and hardness that the following year, 2020 brought with it, in retrospect it was a good thought to start the year!
I’m not one for resolutions, I just like to continue or become better at doing whatever I was wrestling with the year before, (and probably the year before that!) but as I tuned into my own heart and my own quiet exhaustion, I decided that what I most needed this year was to be kind to me.
I find it fairly easy to be kind to others – because I practice it on purpose I’m aware that it is something I need to be, consequently when I get it wrong I generally know it and no amount of self talk lets me off the hook! I’m sure it’s this way for most of us where as kindness to ourselves can be a bit of a grey area.
Like most women my standards for myself are way up there and therefore hard to achieve and even harder to maintain if they are attained, hence, entering a new year I am usually already mentally whipping myself into shape, making decisions to leave the Christmas goodies behind before Christmas is even over and even making a decision not to buy that tin of quality street because I know my will power is questionable.
Without sounding too wet and feeble, I was aware of the need for a softer entry into 2020 than I usually give myself, self-kindness needed to mentally be my new year’s resolution.
It occurred to me that the bible verse, love your neighbour, is often quoted but can only be achieved when you understand and do the last part of the verse which is ‘as you love yourself’ if we don’t love ourselves, how can we truly love anyone else? In other words, be kind to others as I’m kind to me. Food for thought and clearly a work in progress that I revisited as 2021 approached. Looking back on all 2020 had to offer, there was kindness in abundance as we all pulled together but the opposite was also true as we all had our own personal struggle with lockdown.
I’m going to revisit this theme on a personal level again next year and the year after that. To be honest, it was a constant challenge in 2020 to be kind to myself in the midst of all the year required of me, I’m sure you can relate! I really did need to dig deep to maintain kindness to myself and others! I think I’m doing a better job in 2021. There has been a need to let ourselves off the hook from our self-imposed harshness (for me, being balanced about gaining a few pounds and focusing on being healthy inside and out rather than starving myself, was kindness) and hey, let’s keep going, it’s a goal that I’m going to continue to reach for in this lifetime. I’m realising more and more that how I treat others or respond in any given situation has far more to do with what’s going on in me than what’s going on around me.
As I Was Thinking 